When you’re going through a separation, it’s almost like the only thing you can think about. However, there are still other things going on in your life that need your attention, and your children will certainly be one of those things. It’s crucial that you take care of them, even if the situation you find yourself in is less than ideal.
The best thing you can do for them and for you is to work out how to create two happy homes after a separation. This will give you and your partner something positive to focus on, and it will ensure that the children have something good waiting for them even after their parents have split up. With this in mind, here are some ways to create those two happy homes.
Positive Co-Parenting
If you’re no longer living together, then it’s vital that you and your ex work together to be positive co-parents for your children. Co-parenting means working together as a team to provide constant care and a lovely, comfortable place for your children to live in — in both houses. It’s good to look for outside advice about this, as it’s likely that you’ve never had to go through it before, and Two Healthy Homes is a website with some excellent resources to help you get started.
Some ideas to help you on top of this include the fact that you should always make decisions together if they’re linked to your children. In this way, whether it’s about healthcare, education, hobbies, or anything else, you can show your children that you’re united and you can prevent any issues from arising.
Shared Rules And Routine
When the rules and routines are different between different homes, this can be confusing and even upsetting for children. On top of this, it can lead to even more disagreements and conflicts between you and your ex-spouse, meaning that the relationship you have gets even worse, and the children will pick up on the problems even if they’re not witnesses to the argument firsthand. This can make it much harder for them to adapt to their new life with two homes.
This is why it’s so important to keep things the same, no matter whose house they’re in. This links to bedtime, the food they can eat, when they do homework, and so on. If they’re not allowed to do something in one place, they shouldn’t be allowed to do it in another. The parents should discuss this to make sure that everyone understands.
Their Own Rooms
Ideally, the children should have their own room or a space they can call their own in both homes. This can be hard depending on the property and the budgets, but if it’s at all possible, then the children should be given a place that’s theirs and theirs alone.
This will make them feel much more at home and give them a sense of belonging, which will ensure they settle in more easily not just to the house, but to their new life as well. Take the time to decorate it in the way they want so they really feel comfortable and safe there.
